And another thing...X-File rant supplemental.

Diana believes that the only explanation for Scully's happiness is that
the baby is Mulder's. Scully's too smart, she contends, to be happy about
some bizarro alien immaculate conception. Which means they rooked us. I'm
not talking about some graphic sex scene, I'm talking about acknowledging
their romantic relationship onscreen. Carter is too adversarial towards us,
the fans. He'd rather do this winky-poo did they or didn't they thing than
write compelling adult drama.

Lastly, I forgot to mention one of the worst things about the finale.
Sometimes I can't read my own writing (yes, I take notes.) when I wait so
long after the show to write my reviews. Anyway, HOW STUPID was Krycek's
"murder" of Cancerman. I know Krycek is a total screwup, but are they
kidding? He pushes the guy down the stares and HOPES he killed him?
Doesn't even check his pulse? Or shoot him? I mean, this is a man WE
SAW get gunned down several years ago. So, he's "risen from the dead" before
and of course, he'll do it again. We know cancerman will be back, but
couldn't they come up with a better "death" than this? Apparently not.

OK, I think I'm done. Until I read another Chris Carter interview or
read some casting rumor on Mr. Showbiz. ;)

Christine :)

X-Files 7.22 "Requiem" Full On Rant

In this week's "Entertainment Weekly," Chris Carter says he believes the
show could go on for several years--with or without David and Gillian,
mind you--I guess he's pretty sure we're going to JUST LOOOVE Scully's new
partner next year, eh? The thing that drove me nuts is Carter said he
can see the show go on for years because there are "more stories" to tell.
Really? REALLY. Because, if that's true...why didn't you tell any of
them this year? He also claimed that he ended the show this year the same way
he would have if this were the end of the series, which I find HIGHLY
dubious. I also feel this year was just plain chickens*&$. They didn't
know what was going to happen with David so NOTHING HAPPENED all year.
No revelations, no character developments. Except in this last
episode--Scully's pregnant! Sigh. I'll get to that later.

I don't think Chris Carter cares about anything beyond the truckloads of
cash Fox has given him. We had some great years, but I don't believe he
knows where we're going or what's going to happen or anything. I'm glad
he invented the show, and these characters, but I'm not confident that he
knows what's best for it now. This is similar to my feelings for George
Lucas, who has completely forgotten how to make a great movie. I'm so
grateful to him for "Star Wars" and "Empire" and certain parts of "Jedi"
but then he goes back to re-release them and inserts pointless and
disruptive scenes into the middle of a film that won his ex-wife an Oscar
for editing and is quoted as saying it's been bothering for twenty years
that there weren't enough cute little creatures running around in the
background and it makes me want to scream. "Phantom Menace" had some
cool stuff in it, but it was, like much of "Jedi" too cute. He claims this is
to make it "kid friendly," but Star Wars was a wonderful experience for
me at six, when I saw it for the first time, yet it isn't a kids movie.

Maybe success just clouds your vision. Maybe no one's telling Chris
Carter how dumb his show is, or else he isn't listening to them if they are.
The Season Finale was better than much of the year, in that it was scary
at times and brought us back to what made the show cool and addictive in the
first place, namely the serious business of evil and aliens. It brought
back all kinds of X-Files lore: deadly alien goo, cars losing power and
the always popular "lost time." It brought us back to the Pilot episode in
fictitious Bellefluer, Oregon (Bellefluer is Carter's homage to his
hometown of Bellflower, Ca) and it was nice to see Billy Miles and Teresa Nemins.

But.

The only reason it was so very cool and exciting to see the conspiracy
and Krycek and Marita et al is because THEY TOOK THEM AWAY IN
THE FIRST PLACE.
Carter claimed it was getting too confusing....for who, him? Because
this is a show that used to defy explanation and it wasn't about answers. I
liked all the loose ends and mystery. I never fully understood the black
goo and the manicured man and whatnot. It was just cool. Carter took it
all away, then gave us a year of boring directionless muck, then gives it
back like he's a genius or something? Even an obsessed fan like me
couldn't follow what Krycek and Marita were talking about with
Cancerman--I have no idea why Krycek was in prison, and have no
idea why they would try
to help Mulder and Scully (Does anyone connected with the show remember
that Krycek was lying in wait in Scully's apartment when his colleague
killed Scully's sister Melissa? He certainly killed Mulder's father.)
The scene where the sheriff reveals there's a dead body in his trunk to
the audience but not the good guys was cool--It was even cooler ten years ago
on Twin Peaks.

Another potentially compelling element was Scully's longing for
motherhood--something we haven't seen for AT LEAST a year and a half. So
it comes off forced and contrived in light of Scully's pregnancy at the
end of the show. But they so easily could have mentioned it every now and
again had they not decide to write a sitcom for the last year.
The scene with Mulder in black t-shirt, comforting Scully in bed was so
sweet and romantic. Again, we could have used more of this all season.
They had this connection, this intimacy, way back in the pilot when he
told her about his missing sister while she lay curled in his motel bed. In
has always been the emotional bond between these two that's been so sexy not
the will they or won't they bullsh** that fascinates TV critics TV
executives and people who don't watch the show but still think Mulder and
Scully should "do it."

I've said it before, but. If Mulder really believes his sister is dead,
and Scully thinks the conspiracy is dead, why are they still flying all
over the country and renting cars to chase down genies tramps and
thieves? The whole construct of this FBI bean counter reviewing their
work was just SO STUPID. It had been previously established that
Cancerman put Mulder
and Scully on the X-Files to suit his own purposes--he was kind of under
his protection. With him out of the picture why DOESN'T the FBI shut
them down and reassign them? Why DON'T Mulder and Scully just quit?
Time was
we FELT they were on a quest for the truth and we were a part of it. Now
I'm just watching two bored working stiffs punch the old timeclock. Like
Chris Carter, one wonders if they are merely there for the paycheck.

Again, we're given the SAME OLD CRAP. Cancerman claims that Krycek will
find the "answers to all questions." We were promised that in little
Gibson, the little boy Carter apparently abandoned in season Six? Now
its some Holy Grail of a space ship? The scene with Mulder and Scully and
all the lone gunmen and marita and Skinner and Krycek was Fox's answer to
NBC's "freaks and Geeks" haha. One rumor has Krycek becoming Scully's new
partner which would be so absolutely horrifying I'm gonna chock it up to
delirious Internet geeks making stuff up. Krycek is an evil evil man.
We need more of him, but Scully would never ever work with him EVER.

The scene between Mulder in the hallway, professing their Need, if not
their love for one another was wonderful.
Skinner and Mulder as friends--Skinner should have been made a third
member of the team long ago.

Everything else was lame: Mulder's abduction? We saw Scully get
abducted twice already, we've seen Mulder die. They're sort of in "Dallas"
territory. "Dallas" was so successful with the whole "who shot JR" thing
that they tried to do a cliffhanger every year and many of them were just
stupid (although I would have welcomed Scully finding Patrick Duffy in
her shower this year, let me tell you!). Scully's happiness over her
pregnancy doesn't make any sense to me because...shouldn't she be kind of scared?
I mean, did she see "V" the 80's miniseries? To those who didn't, the
upshot is this: alien baby, NOT GOOD. Does she remember the painful life
and death of her own alien hybrid daughter Emily? OK, I'm maintaining
this is an alien baby because Scully hasn't had sex in years. YEARS. Yes,
I'm sure there are fans poring over every episode looking for places where
Mulder and Scully could have made a baby, or perhaps Skinner? Or someone
else? I mean, it can't be that she merely had sex with someone and
jeepers creepers it turns out she ISN'T barren, because then next season becomes
"Murphy Brown" {Oh god I just invisioned a "comical episode with her
investigating an X-File while very pregant ala frances McDormand in FARGO.
Oh No....OH please, NO}

Either way, seems Scully's family would be interested and involved but we
haven't seen them since they helped her bury the afore mentioned Emily.
So don't get your hopes up. And can you imagine the audacity of this show
if they say that Mulder and Scully DID sleep together and we didn't get to
see it? Not that it would surprise me, the bastards. Carter actually
"teases" us in Entertainment Weekly about the scene in Gillian's episode where she
leaves mulder's apartment. PUH. LEEZE.

Still, I'm glad this isn't the last year, because this would be such a
crummy way to end it, and maybe they can do better...
Stranger things have happened--on this very show, in fact :)

Plus, I like ranting ;)

Have a great summer, and I'll see you next year. :D Christine (send all
X-rumors here).

X-Files 7.21 "Je Souhaite"

Okay. I actually liked this one. Yes, I know, it was humorous, but not
in the way that has annoyed me during the last half of this season. It was
whimsical, but no one lost their integrity. I hate to admit it, Diana,
but your boy Vince Gilligan can indeed USUALLY be counted on to deliver the
goods. I liked the X-File in this one, it was just a neat idea--I can't
believe they haven't done genie's before, and wasn't this actress great?
Paula Songe? Never heard of her but I thought she rocked. Also liked
Anson and Leslie--I loved Leslie's horrible attempt to cover for his
brother when they first arrive in Missouri. Mulder and Scully were
vaguely goofy in this episode but not clownish. Liked that Scully knew her
antique furniture. The scenes without Mulder and Scully were acceptable in this
one for me because I found the interplay between the brothers and the
genie so delightful. Loved the invisible man autopsy (wasn't that cool?) and
Scully's possessiveness and giddiness was hysterical. She was just so
scientifically thrilled. I felt bad for her when she was embarrassed in
front of the doctors.

This was the Aesop's Fable episode of the X-Files. Liked the super cool
trailer explosion. Liked how bummed Scully was when she lost her
invisible man, loved know it all Mulder with the genie. "Make me cool like the
Fonz," nuff said. Loved Scully's familiar mocking skepticism. Loved the
genie's old school 15th century wishes. Loved that Mulder was desperate
to find Scully in the empty world--but one can't read too much into that
since his whole family is dead and he has no social life. She really is all he
has. Mulder's exasperation when Scully began to doubt that she had
seen...so to speak..her invisible man was absolutely priceless--Mulder,
we know exactly how you feel. Loved that Mulder used his last wish to free
the genie--aww, he's not ALWAYS an ass. Not always.

The last scene was so cute--Mulder making them watch Caddyshack. I've
never seen it, actually, so I can't weigh in about its being a guy movie.
Loved when Scully almost choked on her beer when Mulder failed to
duplicate her neat little bottlecap flip. Their friendship is just so damned sexy
when they remember it.

I waited to do this review until I saw Gillian on Letterman tonight. She
said she spoke to Chris Cater and they still don't know whether this was
the end or not but she maintained that "under the right circumstances
(?)" they would all want to come back for another year. She said Carter was
in talks with Fox at this very moment. I'm sure it will be back, I just
don't know who'll be there and who won't. She also said they shot two endings,
one for a Season Finale, and one for a SERIES finale. She said it was
just one thing that she says at the end of the scene that changes EVERYTHING.
Take that for what it's worth.

I will be out of town next week so I'll probably do the review from my
parents computer like I did a little while back. It would probably
behoove us to watch the "Pilot" episode this week, since they are taking us back
to the "very plausible' state of Oregon where it all began "seven" years ago
(It's actually eight if memory serves, they date the Pilot in March of
92, but in subsequent seasons, they have referenced 1993 as the year Mulder
and Scully started working together.) If anyone has a DVD player out there,
YOU ARE going to either buy or rent the disc that has first season
deleted scenes, just so you know. I'll bring snacks. :D

SO, have a great week. Be careful what you wish for (an eighth season of
X-Files, for example).

Christine :)

X-Files 7.20 "Fight Club"

I'm losing my will to write these reviews> I feel like I should start
citing my old reviews since I keep repeating myself.

OK. We've seen this before--people are going crazy and we don't know
why. Second season's "Blood," where someone (probably the government) was
manipulating citizens to kill people through electronic stimuli. Then
there was season three's "Syzygy," a pretty funny episode about two girls
who are best friends. They share a birthday, and for whatever reason,
this leads to bizarre and violent behavior on their part and on the
townspeople and of course Mulder and Scully.

So, basically, even in the end times of a once great show Chris Carter is
cribbing from himself.
I'm tired of the relentless self-aware humor of the series this
year--they
won't DO ANYTHING, but they'll make winky little jokes about how long
things have been exactly the same as though it wasn't in their power to
shake things up and change the routine had they had any guts whatsoever.
The jokes and comments about Mulder and Scully's platonic relationship
etc. are also a tiresome attempt to address us rather than entertain us. They
could have explored this a little, they could have had one of the pair
become interested or involved with someone else (remember all that great
early series jealousy between them?) but instead they have given us a
year of in-jokes and hedging.

I'm beginning to wonder about ol' Chris and his vision--why not blow the
lid off this year? I mean, even if there is a season eight (a prospect
that feels more and more likely) out there, why write season seven like
you're afraid? The major change in the series development--Scully's
abduction early in the second season was written only because Gillian
became pregnant and they needed to write a powerful explanation for her
absence from the show's canvas. The show, therefore, owes much of it's
success to it's ability to deftly handle real-life problems. But the
tables have turned, and now real life has crippled the show. They have
been unable to construct a story arc that doesn't get all of us thinking
about the actor's contracts.

I hate hate the score of this show--everytime anything is remotely
whimsical, Mark Snow has to hit us over the head with it.
The whole "mulder and scully" lookalike thing was stupid (see above
commentary about addressing sexual tension rather than exploring it).

I really liked the scene between Mulder and Scully with the slide show.
They were very cute and Scully was at her "Lisa Simpson" best.

The thing about the twins both working at Kinko's copies reminded me of a
joke that the warm up guy for the studio audience of "Politically
Incorrect" used to say. Now, I was a page and responsible for seating
the audience back in 95--third season X-Files, it was never better. ANYWAY,
I had to listen to this guy's act and it was always the same every night
and it wasn't very good either but he had one line that has stuck with me
because it was funny and in my experience very true:
"Kinko's is an office run by people that have never worked in an office
before."

Scully's "I guess that's why they put the I in the FBI" was something
Mulder told her in the series pilot.

Is anyone safe from the horror that is pro wrestling? What a sell out.

Why were Mulder and Scully telling Argyle Sapperstein about the case? I
missed the part where he was a member of the Kansas city Field
Office--seemed to me he was a crook, but Mulder and Scully never had a
problem with him.

Did we really need to see the bar get trashed TWICE? Did they run out of
time? And why did Mulder and Scully wake up this clearly injured man
(Titanic) to ask him about what happened--it seems like the paramedics
should have been called.

THE BIG BIG BIG PROBLEM WITH THE EPISODE: Scully believes. Now, don't
get me wrong, I think she should have been believing long ago--it's clear she
has believed, does believe in many things. But the fact that it was so
clearly not a big deal for her to say these girls were causing this
bizarrebehavior when you and I ALL KNOW that in other episodes
this year Scully has
been completely unbelieving of even the obvious just really ticks me off.

Because in the next few shows, perhaps the last few, you know she's going
to have some epiphany or share some big moment with Mulder where she
"Believes" underlined italics exclamation point, and they'll want us to
feel like it's never happened before even though it has.

bastards.

I liked Scully with the angry man. Scully is so great when she has to
deal with mere mortals and her grace and calm were such a delight. "What's so
special about you?!?!?!" "It's just an FBI title, sir." I thing Dana is
very very special but I doubt you can trace sperm bank records over the
Internet badge or no badge--especially thirty year old ones. Liked
Scully's smug entry into the auditorium, but not what followed. I don't think
it's funny that Mulder and Scully beat each other up, or that any of those
people beat up anyone else. Pain isn't funny. Oh, and will they be even
remotely beat up next week? Of course not, because it's just a TV show.

That's the problem. Yes, in reality "it's just a TV show," but it's bad
news when the writers and producers of the show are approaching it that
way. I feel like they must start every writers meeting this year with
the words "Wouldn't it be funny if...?" There have been no major departures
in the creative team (yes, Morgan and Wong, but they screwed stuff up too)
so it's the same folks that created the wondrous frightening world I fell in
love and became obsessed with, that have replaced it with this stagnant
and self-satisfied mess.

It's just a sad state of affairs. Take away the "funny assaults" and you
have an episode that would have been a nice change of pace in previous
seasons and I would have said it was OK. But when 75% of the year needs
a freaking laugh track, it gets annoying. It's as though they've decided
anything not related to the now defunct conspiracy should be played for
laughs, and it's not funny.

I'm done. I hope you have good weeks, and here's hoping next week is, I
dunno...scary? I have no idea what to expect, since my VCR cut off the
scenes and end credits while I was out. That would have driven me nuts
two or three years ago.

Talk to you later, Christine :)

X-files 7.19 "Hollywood AD"

Okay. Sorry for the delay. Too much sweeps TV, plus I'm tired, plus I
just found out I'm losing my parking space in Sept. and will most likely
have to move in the next few months. Egad.

Sooo, I may not be in the best mood for this one, but here goes. I liked
parts of this episode, but as a whole, I didn't really connect with it.
I had a lot of ticky problems with it. I know it was a fun episode but I
can't accept that it actually happened.

I liked the opening movie bit, it was very funny--the fake movie. it was
fun that David's "Return to Me" (good movie, btw) co-stars David Alan
Grier and Minnie Driver in the audience. Weird moment in Skinners office, when
the Hollywood guy Federman mentions "Harrison ford's Witness"). David
blew a question about that very film on celebrity Millionaire, but I think it
had to be a coincidence based on my perception of when both shows were
shot. If you recall, David blew a final jeopardy question about
"Breakfast at Tiffany's" and the show had Scully reading the book in a
subsequent episode as a little in joke.

Scully's comment about being "too young to remember" Mulder's radical
icon Micah Hoffman seemed a bit off to me: David is eight years older than
Gillian, but Mulder is only three years older than Scully. Yes, yes, and
I'm a geek, I know!

Liked that Scully seemed to have a sort of disdain for Hoffman and
"yippies" in general, befitting a girl who grew up in the cradle of the
military during Viet Nam and idolized her very very establishment father.
Missy probably liked Micah Hoffman's poetry too.

I found the implication that Skinner has bragged to his sleazy college
pal that he and Scully are having an affair pretty creepy. I mean, it's
funny on one level, but to give Skinner any respectability at all, you have to
say this never happened.

Can Scully read Greek? Do you even have to ask? She rules! Scully is a
great straight man, too.

This story: Catholic priest buying phony damaging texts in order to
suppress them is based on a series of bombings that happened in Utah in
the mid-eighties. A guy was forging fake damaging Mormon tapes to Mormon
higher ups and then started killing people with car bombs, I don't
remember the exact connection there, why he killed people, but he did. The
catholic setting in this episode was nice in that David actually approaches Scully
as a religious person--as a believer. Liked the dancing bone stuff.

I don't mind seeing mulder's pal Chuck the artifact expert, but it
bothers me we've seen him more than Mrs. Scully or even Krycek!

Liked that Scully was eating in the morgue, and liked that she
(typically)
didn't tell Mulder about her visions. there were nice little moments of
warmth and camaraderie between Mulder and Scully, like when they were
being bawled out by Skinner, that made me very happy. As in last years
Duchovny directed episode, David is interested in the goofy best friends soul mate
sibling aspect to their relationship.

This is the second episode to reference lyrics to the Beatles "I am the
Walrus," the first being season One's very cool and creepy "Eve," the one
with the freaky genius clone little girls that murder their dads?

Loved Sci-Fi geek Mulder watching Ed Wood movies over and over, and
Scully's line "Doesn't that make you sad? It makes me sad" was classic.
I've seen "The SOund of Music" probably a hundred times, but that makes
me very very happy. Scully scoffs at Mulders sci-fi movie, then makes a
reference to Road Runner and Wile E Coyote--in previous season's we've
learned Scully likes: the Exorcist, Rocky and Bullwinkle, & Laurel and
Hardy.

The scene of Scully teaching Tea Leoni to run in heels was pretty darn
hilarious, as was the whole bubble bath split screen scene. I loved
loved loved Mulder's zombie theory, and the "no ifs ands or bees" line in the
fake movie. No way they'd be named Mulder and Scully though, but I guess then
it wouldn't be as awkward for heroes during the love scene as they heard
their names. In the cemetery scene, I loved how Scully was just enjoying
Mulder. Enjoying his rant, his presence, him. The show could use more
of that...in the next three episodes. Liked that they shared a joke at
Skinners expense--I like when they play up the bad kids--school principal
vibe between them, but again, scully would so have a grounds for a sexual
harassment suit if Skinner actually behaved this way which I choose to
deny. Dancing zombies...don' t know what I think about that yet.

So, there was plenty to like, even though it had flaws--I mean, I have
problems with the whole show biz angle, it always comes off a little too
"in" and winky, seems to me, when Hollywood makes fun of its self, but
that's OK.

Hollywood reporter says the finale of X-Files is "open to interpretation"
and will suit whatever purpose. I'll believe it when I see it. I hope
they don't go out with a whimper, but we'll see. Even if the finale
kicks ass, the show clearly has been in decline since season four. In regards
to worst episode EVER, only two of you have written in, though I will count
Shelly's vote for the one that Gillian wrote and directed last week,
which inspired me to ask. SO, keep your responses coming, people! Since space
allows here's the two responses I got, from Diana and Jim:

DIANA SAYS:
when you ask what is the worst ep of X-Files that takes a lot of thought!
I would say "Field Where I Died" except that that episode never
happened.
For the record I think that's the worst one for me--but mostly because ofthe
character implications [Christine note:past life regression epsode]
As far as the ones that really did happen....there's First Person
Shooter. [Christine Note--this years salute to "Tron"] I
was pretty embarrassed by that one...maybe we should be able to pick the
worst from each season...Teso Dos Bichos [c-killer fake kittys] comes to my
mind also, but maybe because it
was the first bad one I saw.... How about that one that I can't
remember--you know the time travel one? I think it started with an "S"....
[Yes, Diana, it did, it's called Sychrony] and Travellers is
an excellent choice.

JIM SAYS: my least fav episode?
"CHINGA"
a.) it sucked
b.) the show lost its soul by having the ultimate guest writer. (I
like King but not for this show.) What next? Easily identifiable guest
stars (Lily Taylor, Michael Mc Kean, Lily Tomlin...)
c.) I have written a horror script about a child and his doll. Chinga
gives the whole concept a bad name. [Christine note--I've read it and can
confirm that it is scarier than Chinga, but i liked Chinga and was
creeped out by it]
d.) It was the episode many people asked me about and I finally stopped
trying to defend. Chris Carter let the show down.
e.) Scully in a tight t-shirt couldn't even save it.
f.) cheesy find the floating doll ending.
g.) having the agents split up is one thing but solo adventures are
obvious attempts to schedule the least amount of actor work days per episode.
If they can only do ten episodes but the agents are working together then
only give me ten episodes!
h.) felt like something King dug out of his "notes drawer" rather than
an X-File.

Keep those cards and letters coming kids! Talk to you later, and if you
hear of any cheap apartments where I can afford to live alone and park my
truck in relative safety, let me know! No Diana, not in Orange County!
Christine :D