X-Files 7.6 "The Goldberg Variation" : Fox Mulder...Super Genius!

Hey! My e-mail title refers to how Wile E. Coyote would say "super
genius" after his name. Say, I liked this episode a lot. It was different and
whimsical and cool. Yes, the end was a bit manipulative and hokey, but
so is "the Green Mile" and it's got Oscar buzz!

Quibble: Do elevators anywhere actually still play elevator music? I
haven't experienced this anywhere, really. maybe I don't go to enough
swanky mob hotels. Like how they did a mob episode in Chicago, very
fitting. Loved Scully's mild irritation at Mulder's theatrics when he
comes out of the sewar on that elevator thing. But, doesn't she seem
irritated in a different way? Not the usual "Let's get down to business" way she
usually is, but more the "How can I get my boyfriend to be less
embarrassing in public" way? Yes? They just seem to be more
flirtatious.

Liked Scully's knowledge about what the REAL FBI agents are doing, you
know, trying to catch criminals, haha. Mulder's hair is a bit
strange--not the disasterous second season porcupine do, but a little weird, too
buzzy. Scully's awful pun about the one-eyed Ritchie gets a real laugh from
Mulder, usually he's the one to make the terrible joke, which she
pretends not to find amusing. Loved Scully's amusment at Mulder's lack of
mechanical ability. Mulder and Scully seemed to be very aware of how
cool they are compared to Henry and the rest of the schmos they encounter in
Chi town. I loved Henry's contraptions--made me miss playing "Mousetrap."

OK, Scully and Mulder in the elevator, Scully seems anxious to return to
Washington--and then what? They better not be "Law and Order" dating on
us, they sure are giving us some subtext. Scully's just so winky with
Mulder. FOr those of you who don't watch Law an Order, they don't give
you much insight into the characters private life, but they had a season
where the two main lawyers (Sam Waterson and Jill Hennesy) started dating,
sleeping together and then broke up, all off-camera. It was just
implied. It was really cool.

I wasn't kiddin when I called Mulder a genius, and though he wasn't
profiling this week, I totally bought his being able to do a forensic
analysis of the bizarre crime scene that is both quick and correct.
Genius has been described as being able to make connections faster than normal
people can, and with fewer steps, and Mulder's beautiful mind (as Scully
likes to refer to it) can do that, can see the truth quicker than most.
Love compassionate Scully, and love how Scully can always connect with
the kids--it's always genuine, too. NOW, Scully says "I like baseball too."
Some of you may take this as contradictory because last year, she implied
to Mulder that she never played before. Now I honestly think she played
"helpless girl" just to get Mulder's arms around her (more power to her).
But, feel free to interpret this as a newfound love of the game based on
her growing affection for Mulder and the things he loves. But, Scully was a
tomboy who knows about fighter planes and air-rifles and climbing fences
and such, I'm sure she played baseball on the base. Baseball suits
Scully too, the stats and science of it. A game of inches would appeal to Dana,
in my opinion.

I hope Scully got that info on Henry from Danny, remember Danny? Used to
be Mulder and Scully were always calling "Danny" for help on their cases.

Liked that 1989 was the pivotal year when everything changed for Henry
Weems--class of 89 RULES!!!!!!!!! Liked the cow scrather lotto tix.
Like the idea that for one person to be that lucky, other people have to
suffer, for balance. David and Gillian just sparkle this year, maybe I'm
mistaking the actor's joy at the near-end of the show for their
characters romantic feelings for one another, i dunno. I would have liked Scully to
be a little more concerned for Mulder and his wound, however slight.

This episode reminded me a bit of my fave, Clyde Bruckman (there's still
time! most of you haven't fessed up!) You know, the whole idea that
what might seem on the outside to be gifts are really curses. X-Files can be
very Twilight Zone when they try. I just really liked the heart of this
show, I felt it was really lacking last year. Remember that horrible
hurricane one where that mother and son were eaten by the drain monster?
ANd then the rest of the show is played for 'laughs'?? Not so here,
where we care about Ritchie and his mom, and believe that Mulder and Scully
(moreso Scully, but that's par for the course) really care too. Loved
when Scully said "Mulder, you're speaking as though we're caught in one of
those contraptions of his," and Mulder nodded like "Yes, exactly, I'm glad you
understand" even though she didn't mean to sound understanding at all.
Liked how Scully's comment about Wile E Coyote and the mechanical
contraptions set up the bizarre "cartoon" violence sequences, that were
quite different and neat-o, I thought. I didn't feel like it all tied
together quite so neat, you know, I didn't really "get" if Ritchie took
ill for a reason, unless it was so that he'd get the kidney THAT day, the day
the gangster was going to die, but, all in all, I still thought it was
great. My slight objections to the end probably have more to do with my
being too cynical than the show being to whimsical.

That's the last new
show until next year--next decade--next century--next millenium! Except
for you math geeks :) Diana of Orange informed me that my statement
about the turn of the century was wrong: turns out, our ansestors DID get it
right, and had their big HOO HA in 1901, not 1900. OK, so we're stupid.
All the numbers are changing, all right? Sheesh. Anyway, no reviews
for three weeks--but feel free to write me if you see Green Mile, I'm eager
to discuss and debate. I mostly felt manipulated by it. By the time of my
next review, we'll be deep into the
playoffs, and for the first time since I was in...grade school I think,
the 49ers won't be in. I'm rooting for "6-10" to end the season. Even so,
there' are plenty of teams I'm rooting against: Dallas (evil) Green Bay
(annoying) and St.Louis (they're the freaking RAMS, for crying out loud,
I don't need a REASON). Sigh. football doesn't bring out the best in me,
does it? Have a very wonderful Christmas and a very peaceful and
typically silly New Year's (Is it still New Year's Diana? We can call it that,
right?) and be safe and happy and, so long as it doesn't upset the
balance of the universe, I wish you a little luck (unless you're Troy Aikman or
something). :D Love, Christine.

X-Files 7.5 "Rush"

I Got the Bullets! :)

Just a little Rebel without a Cause humor for you, folks. I liked how
this was like those 50's movies about bad teens--the new kid comes to town but
falls in with a bad crowd. I liked it. It wasn't *great* but it was
pretty good. Liked that it was a drug metaphor without being preachy.
Loved the two charismatic leads--mad max and tony. Tony was played by
the guy that was David Cassidy in the recent Partridge Family TV movie (loved
it). The girl was OK, but her character shifted without
explanation--from bad girl to sweet girl without any real reason. But, that may have been
intentional (see Natalie Wood in Rebel without a Cause).

Does anyone care about the Billboard Music awards? I'm an award show
junkie, but billboard isn't voted on, it's whatever is the best selling
record. SO every category you just pick the one you are the most tired
of hearing and Ta Da! We have a winner!. Mulder's opening crack about
Scully's being stuck in traffic: DC and LA each have three or four each
of the top 20 gridlocks in the country, FYI. Scully's usual skepticism: I
must reiterate MY belief, which is that Mulder and Scully MUST go on
dozens of "scooby doo" type cases where there is no paranormal goings on, just a
bitter old man with a slide projector--otherwise Scully would be TOO
ridiculous (although she is still pushing it). Scully sounding like a
cop, sites PCP's ability to give a perp (missin my nypd blue) super human
force ala the cops vs. Rodney King. I liked the way Scully said "What kind of
force?" It was sort of resigned to being annoyed for a few days. just
me or was Scully flirting with Mulder and futzing with his tie in a
suggestive way (review the tape, her hands are off camera, but I stand by this
interpretation) when she asked if they could check out Tony's friends:
"For Me?" And, like many a man before him, he's powerless to resist
Beautiful Scully.

The girl's name is "Chastity Raines." No wonder Mulder likes her, she's
got a porn star name! The "Betty" reference (there are Wilma's and
there are Betty's, it's a Flintstone thing) seemed REALLY dated to me. So
1994. But, I don't hang with the kids, what do I know? For those "down" with
the kids and their lingo, let me know.

Ala last season, the score is a little too hammy. Mark Snow needs to
tone it down a little. I'll bet if we go back and watch season one, we'll be
like: "It's so quiet!"

I'd like to relay an amusing conversation I had with my twin, Jen today.
We were watching foot ball together over the phone: she was watching the
niner game and I was watching the Rams/Panthers and the Colts?Dolphins
game trying to catch highlights of the 49er game because they are showing
the Rams now--all the LA "die-hards" (HAHAHAHAHAHA) have no-doubt taken
their "Jim Everett" jerseys out of moth balls and are down at the sportsbars:
GO RAMS! Puhleeze. ANYWAY, one of the channels had Marv Levy (former coach
of the Buffalo Bills) on, doing analysis and Jen says, "Didn't Marv Levy
die? Or am I thinking of someone else?" And I'm like, "Uhh..i certainly
hope so, because otherwise, my statement about Zombies last week will
haveto be rescinded." It was funny. To us. Had to be there.

This was similar to Lost Boys--new kid falls in with bad kids with a
paranormal twist. Chuck, the spectral analysis dates back to second
season, and (calusari) and we saw him most recently in last years
finale--he and Mulder had that annoying conversation about Magic circles,
if I'm not mistaken. He mentions a project he's working on for JPL:
That's the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, Ca. They're in the news right
now because of that very expensive thing we sent to Mars that isn't
working: the first man we send to Mars should be a cable guy. Liked the
teacher's horrifying death in the lunchroom. It was creepy and gross. Bet the
Pittsfield school district is regretting those budget cuts that
eliminatedon-site counselors! (little back-story for ya). I found it annoying
that Scully is so skeptical, having seen telekinetic powers in First season's
(awful) "Born Again" and third season's (wonderful) "Pusher." AH,
Scully, will you ever learn?

For those of you who may doubt that a school would let a kid walk around
with a letter jacket that had the word "SUCKS" emblazoned on it, There
was a guy at my school, "Chez Fry" was his name, pronounced SHAY FRY, you
can't make this stuff up, who had a letter jacket made with "beer drinking"
stitched on as the sport the excelled in. Wore it to school all the
time. M! M! MIN! U! U! UTE! M! M! MEN! MIN! UTE! MEN! *clap clap clap clap*
MINUTEMEN! SOrry, I was momentarily possessed with a school spirit! Har
Har. You know *Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days" playing* I myself
lettered in Cross Country and Track. Now I get winded walking up the four flights
of stairs to my apartment (the elevator scares me, it's an old building).

ANYWAY, Again, I'm not "with it" enough to know if the "Smells like teen
Spirit" joke was dated either, because I'm sure Nirvana is still
relevant, I mean, I HOPE so. But it is a *gulp* EIGHT year old song, so it came out
when a high-schooler like Max, even assuming he was senior, was in fourth
grade. Now I remember loving Pink Floyd's "Another Brick in the Wall"
when I was in the third grade, so let's all assume Kurt Cobain had an impact
on little Max even in grade school. AND, they've made the "Carrie"
referencebefore, but it's a classic horror movie and what else are you going to
talk about?

I liked the element of *cost* in this episode--that, like in "Pusher"
these aren't superheroes. They pay a heavy physical price to do what they are
doing, and it's addictive. Again, I liked the drug parallel--they can't
stop, they must continue to "go fast" despite the fact that the higher
highs are killing them. It was cool because Mulder and Scully didn't
have a conversation about the dangers of substance abuse. Have you seen these
commercials that Phillip Morris has to do now. with the "hip kids" saying
no to smoking and telling their parents they need guidance and whatnot?
They are just so manipulative and lame. I honestly think it would be
more effective to make commercials where they tried to tell kids smoking was
cool like those "Sunny Delight" commercials where everyone calls it
"sunny D" like juice is just SOOOO AWESOME! and kids would see through it and
reject smoking, you know, reverse psychology. Not that I'm one to ask.
When I was in seventh grade they had a "just say no" drug assembly, and
oneof the speakers talked about how some people are allergic to drugs and
the first time they try cocaine they die? And I was like "That'd be me." I was
just too chicken to try anything. I always knew I'd have a "bad trip" and jump
out a window because I thought bugs were on me or whatever. Same thing with
the "rush" caves all the kids were talking about in school. I was like,
"No way, what if I get concussions and arthritis? What if I become so
addicted to being super fast I can no longer function in the real world?"

Plus, when I joined the track team, I had to sign a contract saying I
wouldn't take part in any sort of "time-altering" behavior, or I'd be
kicked off the team.

Max's room decor was cool: the Doors posters alluding to the doors of
perception Max has walked through and can never close ("There's a killeron
the road...") When sheriff dad opened the closet and there were all
those black shoes, I got a strong "heaven's Gate" cult vibe, and wondered if
that was intentional. The climactic scene with Chastity shooting Max and
herself with the same bullet, as she's faster than a speeding one, made
the episode, it was just so freaking cool. And loved the closing shot of
Tony staring helplessly at the wall clock as time now drags at a maddeningly
slow pace. It was neat-o.

I have a few Favorite episodes to relay: Heather agrees with me: "Clyde
Bruckman." Man, that's a great one. Diana and Chris both chose "pusher"
which I've referenced several times in this review. That's the one where
the guy can make people do his bidding--but he can't make Mulder shoot
Scully, cuz his love for her is too strong! Jim chose Season One's
"Tooms." That's the second one with liver eating guy who squeezes
through vents and such to stalk his prey. It's also the one where Mulder and
Scully have the infamous "Conversation in the Car" : Scully is helping
Mulder in an unauthorized surveillance of the suspect and mulder tries to
get her to leave because he doesn't want his obsession to hurt her career
(back when he cared) and she tries to call him "fox" and he claims that
even his parents call him Mulder (which we learn is a lie) because her
frankness is making him uncomfortable, And Scully says something to the
effect of : "Mulder, I put my career on the line for no one else but
you," and Mulder looks at her, and the dinner she has brought for him and says
"If there's an iced tea in that bag...this could be love." Scully takes
out the Styrofoam cup and regard it for a moment, then replies with a sad
sigh, "Must be fate, Mulder. Root Beer." And he pretends to be cut to
the quick. *sigh* And &*$% have they been stringing us along for years and
years or WHAT!? Shelly couldn't choose just one (even though I INSISTED
upon it), but rather than try to nominate two, she just gave up and
nominated season three. I mean, I had to count it because of the sheer
audacity! ;) OK Shelly, season three it is (which includes Pusher and
Clyde, btw). I haven't heard from the rest of you, so let us know! You don't
have to know what they're called you can just say "the one where blah
blah blah" and I can figure it out.

OKAY, that's all for this week! Hope the week doesn't drag by too slowly
:D Christine