General Hospital week ending April 11, 2003

(a) Who gave the consistently best performances this week?

No one really blew me away this week, but I thought Chad Brannon was very good--earnest and determined to break down Emily's defenses, haunted by his brothers death, resentful of his father's indifference towards him. He was very subdued when he told Emily about Pete's death--a scene that he could have easily overacted in. I especially liked when Zander saw Cam at Kelly's and Chad was happy with Em, then "Oh shit, it's Dad," and then, sigh, waves him over. Not a big scene, but a nice scene because it was played well.

(b) Who gave the best single performance this week?

Cynthia Preston on Tuesday--all the bullying stuff she did vs. Carly at the hospital was exquisite. She is so good at wringing the very most she can out of her lines, and she managed to be both menacing and witty, "Go ahead, SCARY LADY, Kill Me!" Fantastic!

(c) Who gave the single WORST performance this week?

Tamara's "dizzy spell" on Thursday was pretty lame. Maurice deserves it simply for all the gum-chewing he was doing on Tuesday and Wednesday--such a cheesy and distracting affectation, and his clenched-teeth "Tell Me" to Faith when he once again called her a whore and a slut in front of the five families was unintentionally hilarious, just bad bad acting. BUT, I'm still inclined to give it to Wally Kurth again--he's just too "together" for a guy who thinks his daughter might have REALLY been kidnapped. If TPTB are REALLY in WK's corner, they'll stop trying to give him so much dark and heavy material--it's not his strong suit.

(d) What was the single BEST scene this week?

I loved Cameron and Alexis waking up in each others arms and then doing the, "So, yeah, the baby...she's uh...over HERE, yeah," thing. I enjoyed all the scenes with the baby and give Natalia Livingston major props for continuing her little monlogue while Kristina dropped a rather vast amount of drool on her, LOL.

(e) What was the single WORST scene this week?

Thursday in the warehouse when Jason was gonna "take the fall" for Sonny with the cops and Sonny insisted that NO, he wouldn't let that happen! And you know we're just supposed to be in total rapture over their manly, not-even-remotely-queer-yeah-right love for one another and their freaking "code" blah blah blah. Lame.

(f) Who or what surprised you the most this week?

Coltin continues to not suck, I continue to be surprised.

(g) Biggest WTF moment of the week?

WTF of the YEAR is Carly getting pregnant in the first place when the really great, classic soap opera story is Carly holding the secret truth that Alexis has borne the child--Sonny's child--that Carly knows she never can. THAT'S a good story! This is just boring. And as many others have already commented throughout the week HOW many times are we gonna have to go through the "Oh i was so worried about the baby" thing until November? UGH! That TPTB really think the birth of Sonny and Carly's child (Morgan, gag me) is a November SWEEPS event? Yeah, I'll bet the ad dollars are already flooding in...

Jason figuring EVERYTHING out--he knows Ric's up to no good, he knows Ric must have *something* on Carly, he knows Jax isn't in on Faith's plot, He knows Edward bankrolled Faith's hit, he knows if you've been bad or good so be good for goodness sakes, UGH.

The dialogue was especially childish and dreadful on Wednesday--Jason to Ric: "You're such a LIAR. You have no honor and you're such a liar. And you know what else? You're a suck up and a LIAR", so it was particularly funny that this was the ONLY day in which we got credits so I'd know who to blame--Frank South sucks. Although it's admittedly hard to properly critique GH's dialogue when nobody bothers to memorize it...

Mind numbing Journey scenes: "Do as Borg say--stay in penthouse." "GOD, okay, but like, not FOREVER."

And what's up with Courtney's redecorating the penthouse the day after her bestest pal and sister-in-law almost DIED. What kind of person is in the mood to buy vases and punching bags between hospital visits to a close friend who a) almost died and b) is still desperately worried she might miscarry?

Jason's reaction to the "new" penthouse irritated me. I realize that Korte and Kompany love this idea of Simple Jason who teaches us how silly we are, with our decorated homes and our non-murdering jobs, but he lived in the knick-knackified Love SHack with Courtney, he lived in Robin's cottage, he lived in the Godfather Penthouse with Carly's constant redecorating...did he have to be so, "Borg no understand candles and vases, Borg just lay down on floor after playing pool"?

Guza takes another trip to the recycle bin and has Lucky deck Nik who then falls and hits his head resulting in a scary head injury--happened 4 or 5 years ago with JJ and Tyler at the Spencer house (Nik fell down the stairs, if I recall correctly)

"Our hero" Jason threatening both Jax and Edward with cold-blooded murder--and we're *supposed* to be on HIS side. Then Emily shows up, "Oh Jason, you scamp! Are you gonna kill grandfather? Well I'm SURE he deserves it!"

Summer being all righteous and indignant after Lucky wondered if she only slept with him because Nik paid her. Uh...you ARE a hooker and a liar, Summer, you gotta admit there's some reasonable doubt here.

Sonny running down Jax because he "doesn't want to get his hands dirty" and in the same breath ordering JASON to go kill him.

Why does everyone assume Alexis and Cameron are close? We the viewers have been privy to some fraught-with-subtext exchanges, but unless Scott and Alan etc. were big "Santa Barbara" fans, I can't figure out why they'd think Cam and Alexis were anything more than doctor/patient or friends.

If Sonny's *that* worried about Carly falling down the steps, maybe he should pick up Michael's toy truck off the stairs...

Carly's whole "eating is such a drag," thing. Uh, the one not-crazy thing Sonny is doing is trying to get you to, if not feed your own bony-ass self, then at least feed your "precious" baby. Plus she just spent a couple days in the hospital--real food looks REAL good after that.

Sonny has a drunken-psychotic breakdown in which he brandishes a gun and almost shoots his pregnant wife in the face--but thank God Michael isn't anywhere near AJ!

Would Cameron REALLY still have HUNTING RIFLES displayed at his cabin after Pete's death?? REALLY?

Gee, I just can't WAIT to see if Courtney gets her act together and learns to obediently go to her room when she's told to just like Carly does!

Ric meeting his "secret" partner Faith at the freaking docks, the day after he took pictures of Jax and Faith at that same spot--so in other words, he KNOWS how very unsecret a place it is.

Even though Kin Shriner continues to levitate his material, it's distressing to watch him become a cartoon blow-hard. A few weeks ago I complained that Bobbie had become Amy--now Scott's becoming Taggart.

I don't get why Skye and Jax are together all the time.

I like Sonny going nuts and having a breakdown as a CONCEPT, but in execution, it's a pitiful mess: SNAFU, as they say in the military. A real soap would at least have Carly contacting NMHA or going to nostigma.org or something, getting some advice from Bobbie about how her husband needs therapy but won't ever go. Instead we get harmful messages like co-dependancy=love. Enabling=loyalty. If you really really care about someone, your love can bring about the right chemical balance in their brain! In the same vein, Carly comforting Sonny after he almost shoots her, "Ohh, my poor widdle baby! Did Mama's little boy almost kill his wife? Did he?" Gag.

Liz was waaaay too flirty with Zander on Wednesday.

Carly telling Courtney to put the gun away in a lockbox, that Sonny undoubtedly has the key for, in SONNY'S bedroom in order to keep it away from him. And isn't Sonny a freaking MOBSTER? Likely to have access to many guns should he so desire? Yet Carly's fretting because he took "THE gun," you know, the loaded one!

(h) Line of the week, if there was one?

Luke to Penny as he steals money from the Kelly's cash register: "Just tell Bobbie I needed the cash for an emergency trip to Bermuda--oh, and don't mention Bermuda for about 24 hours!"

Jax: "Jason. I see you're wearing your serious face--then again, it's hard to tell the difference."

Faith referring to Carly's unborn baby as "The Godfather Part 2."

Sonny to Courtney: "I don't want you to talk!" WORD!

Taggart: "Can anybody explain this to me??" Would if I could, Marcus

(i) Got any shallow thoughts to share?

Does ANYONE know their proper relationship to Kristina? Last week Alexis called Nik the baby's uncle even though they're cousins, this week Emily calls Kristina her "second cousin, once removed, or whatever." If Kristina really WAS Ned's daughter, that would make Emily her FIRST cousin, once removed.

Throw it, THROW IT! Sonny threw a cell phone instead of a shot glass, but I'm counting it.

Here's something for fun--pick a character who SHOULDN'T have that much money and/or interest in fashion and count how many different jackets they own. Zander has worn at LEAST four seperate jackets in the last week or so--makes no sense to me.

If there's anything MORE awkward than watching Steve Burton and Alicia Leigh Willis kiss, I never want to see it. They are the POLAR opposite of hot.

I thought Maurice looked better when he was unshaven.Wally Kurth looked a HECK of lot better on the Soap Opera Digest Awards than he looks on GH these days--what gives?

MAN that was an ugly sweater Nicolas was wearing--not very Cassadine at all.

If I'm ever drowning in icy water or trapped under a car I'd sure want Alicia Leigh Willis and her giant man arms there to save me

What was with the Dark Shadows-like twangy synthesizer music during Sonny's Tuesday meltdown?

Courtney mentioning to Michael that Rosie's with Mrs. De Rosa who "really needs the company right now." Great, even when missing from the canvas, the dog has more of a storyline than Tony, Bobbie and Mac!

Jason and Courtney couch sex was especially gross since it's been established that THEY know Sonny likes to barge in unannounced whenever he feels like it--and did we NEED to see them buttoning up and tucking in after? It just grossed me out.

Sonny's "Carly and Jason are both DEAD" nightmare was another winner for me--have it all the time

And don't get me started on Zander's busting through the window with lovin' on his mind

Peace! Christine