Survivor 14.11 "They'll be lucky if they get fed!"

Mookie and Alex know they're doomed, and they know Dreamz sold them out. Dreamz, being Dreamz, has the audacity to whine to the camera about how his alliance didn't tell him the plan, "I'm not a liar," he says with a straight face to Stacy. She spins well, and Dreamz buys it when she tells him they were all afraid that the other Horsemen were giving him, "like, misinformation," and then Dreamz is happy again, and back onboard with the alliance...except, he still wants to be in an alliance with Alex...Oy! Earl is reasonably confident that he's safe for a bit, with an alliance of 6 and "two on death row." Stacy sneers, "They're outnumbered and they KNOW it and we don't have to stress. They'll be lucky if they get FED." Stacy's on pretty shaky ground herself, I don't know why she's so cocky. The camera fades to the credits on her green, night-visioned and evil face...

DREAMZ A LITTLE DREAMZ

The next day, Alex and Mookie are riled up about Dreamz, and how he hasn't even had the decency to come up to them and own up to having played them. Then, when he DOES come up to them, it's to ask in his little boy voice "How come you guys don't want to play with me no more?" Alex and Mookie are all, "Uh, DUH!" and then Dreamz claims that he was just as surprised as they were about what happened, "We all got outwitted last night," he says earnestly...or deceptivly, I actually have no idea. Alex and Mookie spell out the math for Dreamz: he didn't vote for Cassandra, he voted for Ed---or Mookie, so he's no longer one of the Horsemen. Because he tried to vote out a Horseman. Dreamz owns up to voting against Mookie, but still claims he's on their side. Later, he tells us that he's just "Telling a story" so they'll still give him the million dollars, which is stupid because in Survivor, people--especially men, would rather you own up to betraying them ("outplaying") then continue to lie to them about how much integrity you have. Alex and Mookie seem calm about Dreamz hanging out with them, maybe because they think he's not responsible for his actions.

REWARD CHALLENGE

The tribes are divided into two teams, where one person on each shoots balls out into a muddy field and everyone else tries to catch them (and you score a point even if you catch the other team's ball). This is another "Survivor:Thailand" special, and you wonder if the production staff was sitting around one day and said to themselves, "Hey, the contestants sucked in Thailand, but those challenges were awesome, dang it!" The winners get to take part in a commercial for Olay body products as they go to a spa and rhapsodize about how great it is not to stink. Yau, Boo, Cass and Mookie against Stacy, Dreamz, Earl and Alex. At one point, Cassandra tries to strangle Earl and when Earl complains, Jeff yawns like a bad parent, "It's up to YOU guys how physical it gets." Hokay. I seem to recall Dumbb Robb being DQ's for trying to strangle Clay (who I would have loved to see killed on national TV, actually) in a different Thailand Challenge. I mean, is Jeff serious? Someone could just gouge someone's eye or kick them in the privates and it'd be okay? fortunately, no one dies to do Jeff's indifference, though Boo feels his knee pop and is momentarily rolling around the mud in agony...and then it goes away. I don't know what that was about. Jeff seems particularly annoyed by the whole thing, "Boo, the whole "danger-prone Boo" arc was over once you guys merged and we didn't have to stretch to make the rich, pampered tribe look interesting, so either suck it up, or let's call the Med Evac in here and get you out of the game, those are your choices!" Boo goes back to playing the game. Type-A Mookie keeps yelling at Yau for not getting the ball to him and the other team's all-star Dreamz pretty much wins the game single-handedly for his group. They send Boo, who's been living the good life since he got out here, to Exile, where he reads the first clue about the re-hidden Idol and doesn't do anything interesting.

FROM THE FOUR HORSEMEN TO THE MY LITTLE PONIES

Alex, Earl, Stacy and Dreamz take a seaplane to the spa, where they get to revel in taking a shower with those fine, wonderful Olay products. "Being clean is preferable to being dirty! Food is awesome! Rewards are cool!" At dinner, Alex tries to worm his way in by boasting about what a good competitor he is, "I always congratulate others and I minimize showboating," he insists, while Stacy shakes her head as if to say, "Dude, it is soooo not happening!" Then Alex pompously describes himself as "...a wounded lion, backed up against the wall, who's now super-dangerous. Rahhhhh!" Earl refuses to tell him whether the plan is to vote out him or Mookie first, so Alex lies and says, "I think Mookie is ready to go." Punk.

The next day, they return to camp smelling of strawberries and everyone's thrilled just to stand next to them, even the bitter ball of rage, Mookie. He then chats up Dreamz, the human sieve, who's more than happy to prattle on about how he thinks Yau has the other Idol because he's always in camp. So, when Yau is off fishing and everyone else is doing whatever you do when you don't have TV's and Ipods, Alex and Mookie search Yau's bag and FIND his Idol! But they don't steal it...which I truly don't understand, I mean, if you're gonna be as sleazy as to rifle through someone's belongings, at least get Immunity out of it. I mean, there's not a rule saying you can't steal it, is there?? Anyway, they instead go off to cook up a ridiculous scheme to "divide" the alliance of six by sowing seeds of discord by revealing that Yau has been hiding the fact that he has the Immunity Idol even though any reasonable person WOULD keep their ownership of the Idol a secret from most people. ANd where do they hatch this plan? Right next to a thicket where Stacy and Cassandra had been eating pineapple and trying to figure out if an All-Girl Alliance is relevant when there's only two girls left on a tribe of eight people. So ALex and Mookie go on and on, giggling about how brilliant and cool they are, and spinning scenarios where Yau is gonna deny he has the Idol, and then they'll reveal it and everyone will then be on their side and start hating and not trusting each other, while Cass and Stacy try to listen in. Then, Mookie and Alex insist that at the very least, they'll be going out "Scarface-style," which to certain men is like, the epitome of manliness, I suppose. The funniest part, to me, was the fact that ALex and Mookie keep talking like divididng this tribe is such a feat to be accomplished, when really, all six people on would freely admit that it's just a loose affiliation of competitors that would all benefit from three strong athletic guys like Ed, Alex and Mookie being gone. Then Stacy steps on a twig, right out of a bad movie, and the boys realize--or assume, as it turns out, that they've been overheard, so they RACE to confront Yau before the girls can reveal their BRILLIANT plan to the others! It's all very comical, since Stacy and Cass weren't close enough to hear as much as the boys think they did. So, they find Yau-man and tell him the jig is up, "Do you want to tell everyone you have the Idol, or do WE!" Alex sneers. Yau absorbs the shock quickly, and is probably thrilled and relieved that the brain trust didn't actually take the Idol when they had the chance, so he shrugs and tells them to do whatever they have to do. Alex pouts, "Fine, then we WILL!" Yau's lack of fear or denial has taken the winds out of their spiteful sails.

Yau goes back to camp and tells everyone that he did indeed find the Idol and that Alex and Mookie searched his bag and are now trying to blackmail him with the information, and no one seems to even care about the fact that Yau has Immunity, "They went through your THINGS!?" everyone says, aghast at the sneakiness and the attempt at bullying Yau. Elsewhere, Alex and Mookie continue to cluelessly giggle about what they still reckon to be awesome gameplay on their parts. Oy!

IMMUNITY CHALLENGE

Boo returns from Exile and Jeff reveals a giant game of Battleship, though they don't call it that because today was sponsored by Olay Awesomest Bodywash in the History of Time, not Battleship. Everyone picks their co-ordinates secretly, and then calls in strikes to try and hit the others. Fun! Not so fun for Dreamz and Cassandra, who keep hitting their own ships instead of the others. Eventually, Stacy winds up the winner, which is fine with her alliance, who now must decide who to get rid of, Mookie or Alex. Alex and Mookie both pat themselves on the back for how brutally honest they're gonna be at Tribal Council, and Alex intones, "If I'm goin' down, I'm bringing hell with me." Whatever, dude. The others are at odds with who should go. Earl thinks Mookie has checked out of the game and is less of a threat than Alex, but Dreamz thinks Alex is better around camp, and plus, Dreamz is confident in his ability to beat Alex at anything physical. Earl points out that since freaking Stacy won Immunity today, they need to consider that luck will play a part in future challenges, not just muscle. Boo tells the Loose Affiliation about what the clue said about the new Idol, and since it said it was somewhere on THEIR Island, he thinks they need to consider that Alex or Mookie could have it. Since they don't have a clue (literally and figurativly), Earl thinks that's impossible. Still, the others are swayed, and like Boo's (pretty clever) plan to split their votes evenly between Alex and Mookie, so that even if one of them plays the Idol, it'll still mean the second-place finisher will be the other. Earl is nervous it'll backfire...

TRIBAL COUNCIL

Alex starts out by proclaiming that the "rats and snakes" came out at the last Tribal Council, which is such a bunch of crybaby bullcrap. He and his group tried a big plan, and so did the other group, and Alex's group lost. The only betrayal that happened was Dreamz, the others just played the game better. Then he clams that the Reward Challenge revealed "How people play games," ooooh, but Mookie was jerk during that game, and did anyone really cheat? No. What's he raving about? You can see why he's a lawyer though, because he looooves hearing himself talk. Mookie's attempt at going "Scarface" is to whine about being an outsider now, boo-hoo, after being "tricked" by the other side. Is he serious? They tried to trick the other side too, this is SURVIVOR!! Then, Mookie drops the bombshell about how he and Alex "found" The Immunity Idol in Yau's bag and just like the others back at camp, Jeff skips right past the fact that Yau has the Idol and laughs, "You guys are calling people rats and snakes and you're going through people's personal things? That's about as ratty and snakey as it gets--that's something Jerri would do!" earl smiles as the jury glowers at Alex and Mookie. Yau shrugs off the significance of his having the Idol, saying it won't matter the next two votes, because the Loose Affiliation is agreed on getting rid of Mookie and Alex, who sit their meekly, guns a-holstered as the tide turns fully against them. THen Dreamz, predictably, talks to much about how crazy it will be when those two are gone and he has to figure out again where he stands. Alex makes one last pompous promise, about how the remaining six will have to deal with the Karmic fall-out for their actions, how they will be held "accountable" for what they've done to get to the Final three or two or whatever. Yeah, no Duh. You still have to vote for someone, Alex. You still have to give SOMEONE the million dollars. Stacy exchanges well-deserved eye-rolls with Cassandra and Boo and it's on to the vote. The Loose Affilliation sticks to it's plan and gives Alex and Mookie three votes each, while mookie votes against Boo. Alex, however, ensures his continued place in the game by casting his vote for Mookie, which irritates Earl. In his exit, Mookie wishes he was still in the game so he could continue to make everyone miserable. What an unpleasant person you are, Mookie, bye!

Mookie is eliminated in 8th place, where weepy Jenna left us in season One. In the Outback, America rejoiced when Evil Jerri was backstabbed by Colby, Keith and eventual winner, Tina. In Africa, the snotty Brandon went home and in the Marquesas, we were glad to be rid of the creepy yet uninteresting Zoe. In Thailand, Ken the boring NYC cop was eliminated and in the Amazon, bossy Deena sealed her own fate when she tried to betray Alex instead of sticking to her alliance's game plan. In the Pearl Islands, our beloved Rupert was taken from us by jerks like Lil and Johnny Fairplay, ugh! In Vanuatu, Chad the guy with one leg was voted out by the women's regime while in Palau, Jeff held Tribal Council hostage until he talked Janu into quitting so he could keep plucky Steph around another week. In Guatemala, crazy Jamie plotted himself out of the game and in Exile Island, sweet Sally was a victim of the numbers game. Last season, conniving Candice was sent packing at this point.

EVICTED SURVIVOR FUN FACT

I didn't find much of interest on Mookie's bio, though I was a little shocked to find out he's a professing Christian--find some joy, Mookie, finds some joy. He's of course a former frat boy, and I was impressed that he listened three favorite books, since most people this season don't list any.

FINALE PREDICTIONS

I didn't make it, but my other reviews will follow. I always say that, hopefully it'll be true this time :D I hope they don't do it like they did last year where the vote can be split three ways though that's probably. I feel like if Earl and Yau go head to hear, Yau wins, and Earl or Yau against anyone else wins to. Cassandra doesn't stand a chance. I'm curious about Boo--the others don't seem to care for him, but I imagine if he made it to the Finals, he could beat say Casandra and Dreamz? maybe? Dreamz can make a case for playing a brilliant game, and if he cops to his lies instead of claiming to have played with integrity, he's got a shot. Hopefully, Earl or Yau comes out on top.

Peace Out! :D
Christine