Survivor 11.13 "I'll think about you guys when I see the stars through the sun roof of my new car!"

BEFORE WE BEGIN

I don't know how many of you are watching "American Idol", as i do every season, but one of my all-time pet peeves about the really really bad people is they're always saying, "I've been singing since I was 2 years old," and I'm like, "Who hasn't?" All babies sing, it doesn't mean they're gonna one day make a living at it. I'm endlessly fascinated with American Idol--not just the bad singers either, but the decent ones who seem to thing that because they have a pleasant voice and can stay on key, people are gonna make them into superstars. Okay, focus Christine, FOCUS. Back to Survivor!

LIFE WITHOUT JUDD

Steph chooses to use Judd's outburst (calling them scumbags) to justify her betrayal of him, even though he only did that BECAUSE he betrayed him. Cindy is miffed that she was left out of the decision-making process and Rafe assures her, "But sweetie, we didn't vote YOU out, so it doesn't mean anything." Cindy isn't so sure, "The pattern makes me nervous--we didn't Judd that we were voting out Jamie, and then they didn't tell me they were voting out Judd and let me tell ya, if this was a scripted show, ah'd be real scared of that foreshadowing ah just did." Steph and Rafe assure her that the next person voted out could be ANYBODY, and when they say ANYBODY, they mean, anybody except them.

The next morning, Rafe marvels at the fact that the Final Five in the "Toughest Survivor Ever" is comprised of four women and a gay guy. He also tells us that Judd's leaving has made it easier for everyone to be dorkier, and then everyone takes turned trying to go cross-eyed as they talk about boy bands. I don't know...I kinda miss Judd right about now. Then Lydia tells us that Rafe is, "...a real...gentle type of male." Lydia, he's OUT, you don't need to use a euphemism. Rafe is pleased that he has what he considers to be a real, close personal friendship with everyone who's left, "I'm hoping it 'll get me to the end, even as I continue to screw them over one by one. Go me!"

THE CURSE OF THE CAR

Reward mail consists of a set of car keys, and everyone freaks out because duh, someone's getting a car. Steph makes a point of mentioning several times that she has never owned her own car--though according to the CBS web site, she's proud of the fact that she owns her own HOUSE, so, you know, she's not destitute or anything. She and Rafe don't own cars, but that doesn't make them more worthy of winning one. It's a game show, and even rich people can win on game shows--in facts, they're the ones who can afford to pay the taxes on the prizes.
Anyway, the challenge is the one where they combine a bunch of previous challenges together, and hopefully the Survivors have learned something and can do better than they did the first time, or whatever. The car this year is a 2006 Pontiac Torrent, which is a rather station-wagony vehicle--it's nice, but...it's a wagon. At least Pontiac has learned something since that hideous Aztek, and designed a sleeker wagon. The first round is that one where they have to cross a balance beam and pick up these wood weapons on the way. The first three to cross the beam without falling off move on, and that winds up being Danni, Steph and Cindy. Then the three of them have to huck the weapons (whatever they're called) at tiles, and the first three to break a tile move on. Steph and Cindy move on, and then Cindy puts together this puzzle and jumps in this cart and goes sailing down to victory! Cindy wins the car---meaning...she's CURSED!

Survivor has finally decided to acknowledge what has kept the Internet and coffee houses abuzz for YEARS, which is the fact that the person who wins the car has never won Survivor. I still don't feel anyone won a car in Season One except for Richard Hatch, as part of the Grand Prize package (and yes, some times even rich people can't seem to pay taxes on their game show winnings). Car winners, Colby, Lex, Sean, Ted, Matt, Burton, Boston Rob, Elizabeth, and Ian did not win the million dollars. Yes, Amber did get a car, but that car was given to her because Rob picked her to go with him to the Reward feast--so she didn't win it herself, which is pretty much Amber's Modus Operandi, and it's all community property now, so who's counting? Anyway, Jeff tells Cindy of the Car Curse, and gives her a chance to rid herself of the dreaded Pontiac and all of it's bad mojo by instead gifting the four losers with a car. Everyone's jaws drop, and Cindy is tormented, but she finally decides to keep her car. She doesn't believe in superstitions, and wants to try to beat the odds of the car curse. Steph applauds her decision, while Rafe looks crestfallen. Jeff tells Cindy she can take one person on a spin to a feast at an archeological dig, and she takes Steph since she finished in second place. Rafe would have been the better option since he's oozing bitterness (which he would call moral disappointment), but Cindy doesn't catch that. As they drive to the reward, Steph plays the role of good friend, telling Cindy that she'd've made the same decision, and Cindy should be happy and proud of herself and enjoy the moment. Cindy declares that even had she given everyone a car, that's no guarantee they would have given her the million and then she'd be left with nothing, which is true, in mu opinion. I mean, I might have given everyone a car--I don't think it would have bought me all that much good will, in fact, then everyone would be like, "Everyone loves her since she gave us a car--she can't make it the Final Two or I'm screwed!" and then you're REALLY have a target on your back. Plus, maybe the Grand winner would give me a car, quid pro quo. I'm overthinking this, I know, but that's what blogging is all about. Once they get to the picnic spot, Cindy gets really caught up in her reward, "I won a reward that was a freakin' car!" She tells Steph, "Zookeepers don't drive cars!" Steph says, "This zookeeper does." Cindy is really happy and she's also happy that three women finished in the final 3 of the challenge. The "archeologist guy," as Steph calls him, shows the ladies their feast. Cindy does have some regret, "When will I ever have the capacity to give four other people cars? I don't know anyone who has the capacity to do that. Maybe Oprah." She does think that everyone was happy for her and that nobody's bitter about her decision. Cut To:

SAINT RAFE OF GUATEMALA

Rafe is shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you , at Cindy's decision, "I wouldn't have made that choice, but then, I am a lot more moral than everyone else out here--I mean, I totally love them, don't get me wrong. I just never would have kept that car." Danni also is sure she would have given the cars to the others, with the more pragmatic reasoning, "You have four people who'd be really happy with you." But this is the reasoning of someone who's had her heard on the chopping block for days and days and is looking to curry favor. Cindy thinks she's part of a strong alliance with Steph and Rafe, which is a laughable concept I know, but that's what Cindy thinks. Anyway, Danni and Rafe were apparently so sure that Cindy would HAVE to give up the car, that they were already feeling sorry for her for not getting a car. ANd the least they could do was own the fact that their bitter about not getting a car that they did not earn but they don't, the just cap on Cindy like she's a selfish idiot. Lydia won't join in, claiming that she's happy for Cindy--she won it, she deserves it, good for her. And good for Lydia (you heard me) because she's not being a hypocrite--she'd have kept the car and given it to her son. Period, and good for her because you KNOW she wouldn't get any million dollar reward for her generosity. Rafe continues to harp on the philosophical ideal of the whole thing, insisting that if four people could get cars as opposed to one person getting a car, than the only fair thing to do is choose the option where four people get cars. Then he goes on to say, "If she had given us all cars, there's no WAY I could vote her out at the next Tribal Council." So a new car is the price of keeping your word? There should be no way you'd vote her out at the next Tribal Council ANYWAY, since you have an alliance but wait, I forgot, your alliances are all one-sided. Which is totally legit in the game of Survivor, by the way, it's just annoying when someone does it and then keeps insisting they're morally superior to everyone else. Plus, Rafe KNOWS he wants to go into the Finals with Steph, so he knows that if Cindy gave him a car, it would buy her fourth or third place TOPS. Gah, he's really starting to bug, and I loved him so!

Meanwhile, Steph and Cindy gorge themselves and listen to the archeologist dude tell them stories about the Maya, which Cindy loves. Steph doesn't seem to believe the Mayans could stand eating the corn meal for like, centuries. Later that night, Steph and Cindy agree that they love Danni but want her out because they came into the merge with numbers. Cindy says, "We beat each other, that's one thing, but she'd beat us all." Steph adds, "And we'd look like total idiots." They're pleased with the decision, and feel sure Rafe will go along with it, because Danni is a threat and besides, nobody has promised Danni that they wouldn't for her...yet...

CINDY LOO

The next morning, Cindy and Steph return to camp and Cindy (who has never owned a new car before) goes on and on about how great her new car is, and how exciting it is to own one, blah blah blah. Rafe, with his usual brand of passive-aggression notes, "It's cute and all that Cindy's so excited but there's only so much you can hear about something that you could have had too if only she'd given it to us." Whatever dude. I'd say he could have won himself he wanted it that bad, but Rafe claims he'd have given it away so...I guess he needed Danni to win, that was the only way he could've gotten a car yesterday. But Rafe is right that Cindy us talking waaaaay too much about how great her car is--even if she hadn't had the opportunity to give them cars, even if she merely won the car, you'd think she'd have the sense to downplay her good fortune. I guess maybe Cindy's better at talking to the animals than she is talking to the people. Her car-bragging has resulted in what will turn out to be her death-blow: the fact that Rafe and Danni disagree with her decision so much so, that they've bonded over it.

STEPH AND RAFE: POINT, COUNTERPOINT

I've always felt you could show could teach an entire semester of a Philosophy class by watching Survivor, and this issue with the car proves it. Steph and Rafe have a hilarious exchange about it, and both are so certain the they're right, it takes several minutes before they actually understand what the other is saying. Steph and Rafe are making corn meal, and Steph is relating how happy and excited Cindy was and Steph is clearly happy FOR Cindy, there's no bitterness at all. Then Steph says, "She felt bad, I'm like 'Why'? Why are you gonna give up a CAR?" Rafe replies, "Well, yeah, Danni and I thought she was gonna give up the car." Steph laughs, "So did I, she was considering it!" "Danni and I thought there was no other option BUT to give it up." This does not compute so Steph asks, "What do you mean?" Rafe sighs, "I mean, if been asked that, no way I'd've kept it." Steph looks like she swallowed a bug, "REALLY!? Why??" Rafe begins to drone on self-righteously about how if there's a chance where four people could get a car as opposed to only one person getting a car, then clearly, the only logical and right course of action to take is the one where the four people get the car. Steph tries to wrap her brain around this, "You felt you HAD TO?" Rafe sighs, "Not that I HAD to, but I WOULD have!" Steph shakes her head, unimpressed with Rafe's imaginary grand gesture, "Really? I didn't think ANYONE would do it, I don't think I would've." Steph then calls out to Lydia and asks her what she would have done if she'd won the car and Lydia says she thinks Cindy made the right choice. Steph then tells us that she thinks Rafe sometimes plays the martyr bit a little too often, but she's not that concerned because this is the first time they've ever disagreed on anything. Rafe IS concerned though, "All I was thinking of was that four people could get cars...but it seems like the others were only thinking about what THEY could have, and I know I'm a better person than most people so I shouldn't be surprised but it did make me wonder if maybe I should be playing the game harder than I am?" I dunno, Rafe, you've already betrayed two people in your alliance, I'd say you're playing pretty hard already...

TEDIOUS IMMUNITY CHALLENGE

At the Immunity site, Jeff makes the mistake of asking about Cindy's car, and she once again goes on and on about it. Ominous music plays as Danni and Rafe glare at Cindy. The challenge is one where they're all shackled and tied to posts and they have to unlock these locks and unwind all this rope and untie these knots in order to race to a flag. It's a neat idea, but the kind that you talk all the way through because it takes so freaking long and no one is ever in danger of looking dumb or hurting themselves or saying something interesting, it's just Jeff's grating play-by-play, "Cindy's on her second lock, Rafe, having a little trouble on his first lock, Steph moving on to her third lock..." Like the reward challenge, it come down to Cindy and Steph, but this time, Steph wins. Steph starts sobbing, "Finally, I won something!" It's the first time she's ever won an individual challenge, awww, good for you Steph. Cindy is happy for her friend, because she still has no idea she actually needed Immunity tonight...

ALLIANCE REDISTRICTING

While Steph basks in the glory of her first individual win in her long and storied Survivor career, Danni and Rafe are off professing their loyalty to one another, saying that neither will vote for the other before the Final 3. Of course Rafe won't promise her Final 2 because he's committed to Steph, which is why Cindy was right to keep her car. She was ALWAYS doomed at 3 anyway. Which makes me wish Steph had won the car and kept it, because I would have loved to see Rafe's reaction. Anyway, Danni goes one step further than Rafe and says she'd take him into the Final Two, even if she knew she was gonna lose to him, "I promise you that," she vows. It's a vow she'll regret...well, sorta. Rafe is excited at the prospect of being both Steph and Danni's choice to be brought to the Final Two. He goes to Steph and lobbies her to vote out Cindy instead of Danni. Steph is stunned by this. Rafe insists that they have a way better shot at beating Danni in the end than they do Cindy, reminding her that Cindy hasn't betrayed anybody on they jury. This is actually a very valid, very "Survivor" reason to dump Cindy--Rafe's lying to himself maybe, about how hard he's playing the game, because he's ruthless. He's playing his best friend, because he's NOT telling Steph that he wants Danni to advance because she's his insurance policy. Steph is pretty bent about Rafe's suggestion, but she mad in that way you get when you know you're gonna wind up doing whatever it is someone is trying to talk you into doing, and you're mad at yourself for being such a wimp. Because Steph has been surprisingly wimpy all throughout the game. Behind the facade of Wonder Woman lies a suggestible, obedient follower. She was talked into voting out Jamie, manipulated into betraying Judd and now she behaves as though she doesn't want to dump Cindy but refuses to refuse Rafe's suggestion--and I think Steph has the power to say, "Not this week, we gotta lose Lydia first," something she could have said last time with Judd, too. But she seems terrified of actually being seen as the real leader so she frets to Rafe, "That's another vote, I'm not gonna get Jamie's or Judd's or Cindy's," as though the decision has already been made--she'll turn on another friend immediately after being brought by them on a sweet reward because she refuses to turn on Rafe, who's playing her like a violin, nor does she try to swing Lydia--and you know Lydia would do what Steph says over what Rafe says. Steph rationalizes the decision, "She's got a car, at least." She doesn't completely blindside Cindy though, she tells her that Rafe is thinking about getting rid of her, "You're a threat, Cindy," she adds. Cindy snorts, "He's the one who's won everything!" Word. Cindy tries to get a woman's alliance going, leaving things up in the air as the Final Five head off to destiny...

TRIBAL COUNCIL

The jury is brought in, and they're all wearing bold, monochromatic T-shirts. Judd is clean-shaven. WHen asked about the mood around camp, Rafe replies that everyone is feeling threatened and adds that he realizes there's four men on the jury and he's the only guy left in camp. Judd smiles big at this, a smile that probably says, "No duh, man." Since Rafe single-handedly got Jamie voted out, could have saved Gary and delighted in Judd's departure, I think he's just subtlety playing the Y-chromosome card here, thinking ahead to the Final Two. Danni doesn't notice a change in mood at camp because she's been uneasy since the merge, she feels lucky to still be here as it is. Then Jeff rehashes the Car Challenge events for the benefit of the jury and Cindy stands behind her decision to keep the car for herself, saying she'd be left with nothing if they all decided to vote her out. She then scoffs at the car curse, "The curse is being a tough competitor and winning things, regardless of what it is, a car, a pile of cookies, whatever it is." There's some truth to this, even though some pretty weak players have managed to win the car (Sean in the Marquesas and Elizabeth in Vanuatu spring to mind, though their ouster was clearly not car-motivated, they were loud and annoying and ditched when they weren't of any use). Cindy then goes on to point out Rafe as the most dangerous player still in the game--he wins challenges and people like him. THe rest of the women aren't swayed. She casts her vote for Rafe, but goes down 4-1. Rafe passive-aggressively gushes, "I still love you!" as he writes her name, then when she gets up to leave, he tries to get her to join him in a "no hard feelings!" moment, which Cindy declines. "I'll think about you guys when I see the stars through the sun roof of my new car!" Cindy chirps on her way out. Judd likes the sentiment. In her exit speech, Cindy doesn't dwell on the betrayal, just how much she'll miss "nature's orchestra," the night sounds of the jungle. God speed, Cindy.

Cindy winds up in the dreaded 5th position. 5th place is full of the blindsided and the deceived. Dr. Sean actually believed he was part of Hatch's Final Four, but he was really just his most disposable tool. In Australia, Rodger knew he and Elisabeth were on the outs with the power clique, and he selflessly told Tina that Elisabeth need the money more than he did, so she should be kept longer than he was. In Africa, T-Bird's last ditch attempt to drive Lex to the brink of mad paranoia didn't work, and in the Marquesas, motormouth Sean was sent home after he won a car. Same thing happened to Ted after he won a car--and he thought he was Porn Star Brian's best pal. In the Amazon, neither her dubious intelligence, nor her debatable athleticism could save Horrible Heidi from the boot and in the Pearl Islands, smug Burton won a car, and took Johnny Fairplay with him to celebrate because he never dreamed the women would gang up to evict him. Ha. In Vanuatu, Jeff's way-too-young-for-him girlfriend Julie was betrayed by Chris, whom she'd considered to be like a brother to her. Last season, cantankerous Caryn ran out of usefulness to two-timing Tom.

RANDOM SURVIVOR FACT
Besides being one of this season's many twins, Cindy is one of many people who lists "Sorry" as one of her favorite board games. I had no idea anyone was still playing Sorry. Is it making a comeback? I just find that funny. Not funny is her list of favorite movies in which she lists one of my twin's least favorite films (the Travolta film "Michael") and TWO of my least favorites: "A.I." and "Powder." Note to self: When hanging out with Cindy, suggest an exciting game of "Sorry" instead of renting movies...

Peace! :D

Christine